My 2 favorite girls...

So with this whole blog undertaking, I promised myself that I wouldn't be annoying to others with it, and post something every day, but today was pretty special and I had a chance to reflect a bit and thought I would share. 

Today is October 8th-  and that means that my daughter Mia turned 5 today and that also means that my best friend Lauren would have turned 36 today also.  She passed away last September from colon cancer.  And I know that stories like this one are not entirely unique, which sucks, because everyone has a story about how cancer stole someone important from them, but behind every statistic is a small army of people that don't care about all the numbers and the stats- they care that someone was taken that was entirely too important to be pulled away. Lauren was "my person" (for those Greys Anatomy fans).  So without getting into all the details, she was an inspiration to anyone who met her and for those of us lucky enough to be close to her- she was a beam of light all the time.  Not to mention that she was completely BAD ASS when it came to ANYTHING athletic- breaking swimming records left and right, 3hour marathons, Ironmans- name it- she did it and took names every time! So while 3 weeks ago we mourned her 1 year passing, TODAY I wanted to make sure I celebrated her along with Mia. 

So the morning began with a run- I put on her "Oregon track" tshirt she had given me, loaded up the ipod with some of her favorite music- Sugerland, etc- laced up the boots and off I went...I decided that instead of planning the exact distance, I would have 2 rules for the day:  I would simply run as long as my playlist and to make sure I ran the 2nd half faster than the first- (and I did have more than 3 songs just in case any of you are wondering!).  Its funny because I see a lot of people post their race or training times etc on their blog, or facebook page but its just not for me.  Nothing against them, but really, its all relative to the individual.  Don't get me wrong, I track all the shit like a nut.  Believe me, I remember my race times like I remember my college GPA, my SAT scores and my mortgage rate- thats stuff you just don't forget! But its not really important for THIS.

  I ran a route that I hadn't run since we ran it together about a month before she died (and ps- she cleaned the floor with me that day too- in case you were wondering). I hadn't run it since because for some reason I thought not running it would make me less sad- that was dumb b/c It actually felt great to be in this place- I swear I could hear us bantering back and forth, making fun of people who we saw running with all the "gear" (you know what i mean- enough water bottles around their waist for a month in a dessert and they are out for a 3mile run) and thinking about what we would eat when we were finished- it really always revolved around what food product we would reward ourselves with.  When I was battling some hills, I imagined a rope around my waist with her pulling me up, but also yelling at me for not moving my fat ass fast enough.  Aside from trying to run my best, I spent the time thinking about all the fun we had and all the dumb shit we used to do like wash down a 10mile run with a nerd rope and diet coke-- I mean,  for nutrition majors at NYU, we were really setting the bar low. But make no mistake, we were ALWAYS competing- even if we would seem super casual or cavalier about it on the surface- that was part of the fun! Not letting other people know how serious we were about it on the inside:)  So I finished the run, super sweaty, 2 rules/goals (turned out to be by longest run in recent memory) above accomplished as was left happy that I would  celebrate the life of 2 amazing people on THIS day especially. And I would in fact wash all the hard work away with my weight in chips and salsa and some trashy candy, because sometimes, that is just fun. 

But in the end, it just reminded me of how little time we actually do have with the people we love. It really sucks and  Its super cliche, but its true and I don't know if I can ever be reminded of that enough- because I am the queen of letting all the other stuff take over my day, week, month- whatever.

Which brings me back to Mia- when I got home, I wanted to make sure that she knew how she has made more of me in 5 years, than I had made of myself in the 29 before that.  And that I am so proud of the little quiet confident girl she is becoming. And that I will try to be less annoying with my work phone calls at dinner and at night.  Its not easy, right? Work is important and so is this, and it seems so easy to always prioritize the PEOPLE we love, but it isn't.  At least for me it isn't and I am not too proud to say it.  So I  need constant reminders.  She talks about Lauren all the time- because I always tell her how lucky she is to have the same bday as Lauren- she knows she is in heaven too and asks if Lauren is watching her at her soccer game or at dance. She also always asks if she can do more pushups than Lauren could- which is weird b/c its so random...  It makes me smile because I know she is watching. If Mia turns out half as good as Lauren, I will have done alright:) 

So we topped off the night with making cupcakes for school tomorrow.  Her first time- and MINE TOO because I am such a culinary genius that I have never even made freaking cupcakes-- seriously, that is BAD. But it is kinda funny.  And in case you cared, we had a little competition of whose looked better overall, with icing and sprinkles- she had 12 to do and I had 12- guess who won? I am sure its no surprise that I got beat by a 5 year old.  I just thank god that we are not in the same age group for triathalons and races-- that would be REALLY embarrassing.  Because having your kid bake better than you is not embarrassing at all:)

So CHEERS to my 2 favorite ladies- Happy Birthday:) 10.8.2012

Who would have thought my 2 favorite girls in the world would share the same special day?